Remembering my mom and dad’s crankiness.

Certainly I am not disparaging the significants of Memorial Day. But back when I grew up in Los Angeles usually Memorial Day was the beginning of Beach going and ice cream making. Oh sure, we visited gravesites and paid homage to our ancestors but not until we traveled back to Oklahoma later in the year. Oklahoma was the place all my ancestors were laid to rest. We visited Oklahoma later in the summer and to show our respect, we cleared off weeds and brambles from the gravesites.

But anyway, Memorial Day weekend was the official beginning of the beach and sunburn season. In addition to beach going, Memorial Day weekend was also the beginning of the hallowed ice cream making season. An even more important event and celebration.

My parents were big time Okie ice cream makers. You know, wooden bucket, hand crank, ice, rock salt, and all the trappings for making ice cream. A tradition started back when they lived in Oklahoma in the 1930s and early 40s. And, certainly continuing the necessary Okie grunt work to get to the big pay off of ”Homemade Ice Cream.” This is certainly an effort not for the faint of heart. Or is it, faint of Arm.

So, the tradition had continued when they later moved out to California. Absolutely summer was not complete and over without a big ice cream church pick nick in the park near the beach. Tubs and tubs of ice cream were made. Fresh banana, fresh strawberry, and vanilla. But, we never really got in to chocolate ice cream. Chocolate was just a bit too exotic. Not easy to make. Besides ma and pa loved the fresh fruit kinds of ice cream. So, that’s what we did.

My ma would cook up all the vanilla, eggs, cream and or whatever it took to make ice cream. For some reason I never knew how to formulate all that. It was beyond my job description. You know. Being an Okie boy in L A already came with its complications. Let alone trying to concoct ice cream recipes. My assigned specialty was knowing how to pile in the ice into the bucket, pouring the rock salt, and crank until my arm fell off. Well, that’s just an Okie expression. I still have my arm. I did the grunt work while my ma got the glory.

Actually, it was my dad who took all the glory. He acted as ice cream making choreographer. He was the one telling everybody what to do. When to do it. And, when to stop.

Gentlemen start your cranking! Then, let the scooping begin. I’ll take a scoop of each, thank you.

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Romney must think no one is listening.

What is Romney talking about? Has he been living in a monastery for the past 12 months? Not only has taken a vow of silence but a vow of non-literacy? He obviously is not reading the papers.

Romney has been pooh-poohing the President and saying Obama is bad for the economy. Oh really? Take a look at this article taken from today’s business section of the Los Angeles Times. Here is an excerpt:

“Consumer confidence gets boost this month. By Jim Puzzanghera.. WASHINGTON– Despite Europe’s economic troubles, American consumers are feeling better about the economy than at any time since the start of the Great Recession. Consumer confidence surged in May to its highest level since October 2007, the ninth-straight monthly increase, according to the latest Thomson Reuters/University of Michigan survey of consumers released Friday…”

By the way, did you notice the reference to the University of Michigan? And whose from Michigan? Romney himself. But anyway, need more be said about the economy? It speaks for itself.

All the while, Romney is flat out lying. A blue blooded prevaricator. Liar liar. Pants on fire. And we all know where liars go don’t we? Yes, Bain Capital of course!

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The things you find in the desert. Yum yum.

Baby Big Sister to be, spent the night with Gramma and me. On our morning walk out in the Santa Fe desert, we counted five lizards. Lizards quickly scurrying across the walking path. Running from wheels rolling the little princess K. Critters hoping to avoid squishing and sudden mortality.

Now here’s something interesting. There are some folks in the world that eat lizard. Yes, fried lizard on a stick. Click on YouTube link below:

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But it looked good on my computer screen.

How could something you look at on your computer monitor be worth so much money. It’s just flat screen gibberish. At best just a small talk and gossip column with photos. Billboards brought to your PC. A few Pics and lots of ads.

But as it turned out, the recent Facebook IPO(initial public offering) was a fizzle. Not worth the projected value. Investing at it’s worse. Proving the market will determine the real value of something. In the meantime the Facebook founders run off with a boat load of money. Not as much as they hoped for but a boat load none the less.

So, those of you who invested in the free fall shares of Facebook have learned a market lesson. What’s the lesson? All that glitters is not gold. More form than substance. Hype trumps good judgment. Las Vegas bright lights will empty your pockets. Just a fleeting crapshoot which felt good at the moment. But the let down came fast. Goodbye hard earned cash. Hello reality.

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It’s hard to move about with strings attached

Remember the Howdy Doody Show on 1950s TV? “Howdy Boys and Girls…” All manipulated by strings. And as you may know or remember Howdy Doody and his puppet friends were moved and manipulated with strings from above. They use to call them Marionettes. Legs, arms, and mouth operated over head by a hidden puppet master pulling the puppet’s strings. Puppets giving the allusion of a real person walking and talking. Certainly a fun show to watch.

I loved Howdy and his perpetual smile. And as the show begins, Howdy would walk out on a raised stage greeting smiling, and engaging the kids in the “Peanut Gallery.” “It’s Howdy Doody time! “Howdy Kids, Doody would say with a broad wooden smile. “Howdy Buffalo Bob,” Doody would greet. Just fun and fantasy provided by puppeteer illusionist from above. Hidden manipulators coordinating, choreographing, and controlling all that is said and done. All of which was scripted and rehearsed for great entertainment for the kids.

Well, don’t despair. This kind of activity still exists. You can see it on the nightly news and hear it on the radio. It’s now called the Mit Romney Road Show. Still scripted and rehearsed. And manipulative by attached strings. Strings held by the RNC and the TEA Party. Walking talking, and Mit with a broad wooden smile. “Howdy Boys and Girls.” Greeting people as if they might have the mentality of a second grader. People believing every platitude and empty word former Governor Romney says. Rhetoric so broad and general. Statements made not many could grasp and challenge. Just gas and vapor wafting in the air.

“I can lead America. I am a businessman. I can grow jobs. President Obama is bad for America. I will do what it takes to fix our education system.” And on and on. Hollow platitudes with no meaning for the grass roots American. Just words manipulated through a broad wooden smile. A smile controlled by strings from above.

Is this who you want as president? A puppet on strings? Mouthing partisan rhetoric? Rhetoric scripted so general and meaningless, surely it was meant for someone with a child’s maturity and not for intelligent adult voters. “Howdy Boys and Girls. I am a businessman. Never mind my attached strings.”

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White House For Sale. Just not in the right neighborhood.

Since when has it been acceptable for a money manager to be President of the United States. A vocation totally out of normal profile who the president should be. Not a former General. Not a law school graduate. Not even a former actor.

What does a leverage buy out manager bring to the national table anyway? What would his resume look like? Many company buy outs and restructuring? Many jobs lost through downsizing or bankruptcy? Borrowed money making money? Leverage buyouts? Restructuring management?

How does this translate in to running national government? Will the US Capitol move to Wall Street? Will Private Equity Partners outsource our military? Worse yet, move the Army Air Force Navy and Marines to China? Will the Department of State be sold to India for preferred stocks and some cash?

How about this? Will news of government only be seen or heard on CNBC or Bloomberg News? Will the new White House press secretary be Maria Bartiromo? How will this turn out? Holy Private Equity Batman! This is sounding really awful. Where’s JFK when we need him? Harry Truman! Bring back the “Buck Stops Here” sign.

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Moms in Time Out.

To that great advice columnist in the sky:

Dear Abby:

I am certainly aware of your recent departure from this earth but I need your advice none the less. Why is it that today’s young parents must insist on micro-managing and arbitrating their toddlers play time with other toddlers? Hovering around and policing play activity. Activity which might bubble up in to a mild disagreement. Maybe claiming playing rights with a certain toy. Possibly resulting in grabbing, pushing, and crying. General give and take. Push and shove. Normal child’s play.

After all, what can a four year old do to another four year old? Well, aside from biting. Hardly nothing. Each has the strength of a Gerbil. Non-threatening. Innocuous. Just sugar-fat pushing each other around.

Usually an altercation ending up in a hugging fest. The best of friends in about five minutes. And no thanks to intruding moms. All is Okay. All is well.

However, parents are like grand stands filled with partisan sports fans. Booing, cheering, and yelling things never heard in church. All in support of their favorite team. Emotions swelling to the breaking point. “MY son had it first.”
“No he didn’t !”
Yes he did!!”
“Well, you can just take that toy and…!!!”

And in the mean time, both toddlers are watching in horror how each mom is castigating the other. Fighting like litigants in a courtroom liability suit. Blaming, threatening, and shouting. OMG. Can’t we just get along?

Abby, what’s your best advice here?

VTR,
Okie in Land of Enchantment.

Dear Enchanted Okie,
Call Dr. Phil. I’m too busy doing nothing.

VTR
Abby

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If the truth be known. Online food reviews are baloney.

My Consumer Report:

Here is the dirty little secret about restaurant reviews. Especially reviews offered Online. Either on a restaurant’s own website or on the hundreds of restaurant review sites. Most of which are placed online just to sell Google ads.

What potential eaters may not know is, most reviews are placed there by the restaurant’s own employees. Sometimes placed under duress. “Say this or else!” Creating a silk purse from a sows ear. Perhaps stretching the truth a bit. A review analogous more like too much MSG on a 3.5-ounce grisly steak. “Our best six ounce premium New York cut grilled to perfection.”

Now here is a real stretch. In my little town of less than 80-thousand dwellers you can rate a restaurant up to Five-Stars. Five Stars?? This is NOT New York or Paris. Our little town would be lucky to have a two and a half star restaurant. Don’t get me wrong. There are a couple eateries here that has passable food. Sometimes cooked fresh. Ingredience used from local growers. Sometimes using some organic “Free-range” meats. But that’s it. Certainly not five stars worth.

Cooking fresh and local does not a great restaurant make. A great restaurant does not exist in a casual eating town like I live in. There is no one here willing to pay the cost of a five star meal. For example, a hundred bucks just for an appetizer? Plus a five star restaurant would not accommodate people showing up in bib overalls or wearing their PJs as they do here. Aloha shirts and faded jeans would be turned away. “No shirt, no shoes, no service.” Simple as that.

Then all of this is to not mention an inviting comfortable and clean dining atmosphere, smiling attentive wait staff, professionally trained chess, eye pleasing table settings and dining ware, live music, nearby adjacent parking accommodations, and other items most customers and casual dining restaurateurs seldom think about here. Not in this little town.

The best you could hope for here is, food prepared in kitchens that have passed health inspection. And for the most part, I’m sure most eateries here have. So, happy dining and Bon Apatite senor.

PS, if you are looking for any style of Asian Cuisine here (raw or cooked) in this little town , forget it. What you will find is American food made with snow peas and cashews. However, people most likely don’t come here for Asian. Southwest is what we have. “We got Southwest senor.”

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